So on Tuesday morning, I took Carpenter to a developmental pediatric doctor. We have seen this doctor two times before. The doctor is there to evaluate where Carpenter is in a lot of different aspects! The doctor is a really nice guy. When we were in the waiting room, he enjoyed played with all the toys and was very verbal! Then we head back into the evaluation room but whatever the doc wanted him to do, he wouldn't do it. The doctor got out some paper and Carpenter drew some circles and lines and stuff. The doctor got out more paper and Carpenter tells me he needs to pee pee, which is good because he is telling me more! And he did go! And he was excited! The doctor put out blocks, and Carpenter would not even stack one block!!! I was so frustrated! He can stack blocks all day long, that is a very old skill! No words, nothing! Should I be surprised? Carpenter has seen doctors and therapists all his life, and now that he is getting older he is testing them, are you going to make me do this?
Now that he will be turning 4 in a couple of weeks, I am panicking! Just wanting him to get more goals accomplished. Am I doing enough to help him? I don't want to fail any of my kids! But to say that I am terrified of the public school system is an understatement! The whole goal of going to the dev. ped. doc is to see where he is and what is the best classroom environment. My goal is to have him in a regular kindergarten classroom with a shadow. So I told the doctor this, and he said as pleasantly as he could say, "we'll I think he is going to be in a special education classroom" (the tears are swelling up in my eyes, and I am just praying that I will be able to keep the tears in)! And then he said "but he sure is a cute boy" (I guess this was a comment just to make me feel better, a compliment to ease the pain, I don't know why those are needed, I guess he saw in my eyes the need to escape quickly)! I have heard of some special needs classroom stories that are terrifying, but some are good. I never thought I would want to teach in a special needs classroom, until I saw the Meyer Center with Carpenter.
How will he do at school? I want him to go to our local elementary school and not be switched around every year! How well will he do in the classroom? Will he like his school lunch? Will anyone pick on him? I will hurt anyone that dares too!
Peace, dear Lord, I need peace! A prayer for peace about this whole situation!
I could write more but I think I need to get a break from all of this!
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21 comments:
I can not even imagine how you feel. I can tell you that with doctors Tucker is the same. He is so stubborn and I am like he can talk and they look at me like I am crazy. He talks all the time but will not in front of them. I know you are a wonderful mother, I can tell by your post and the pictures of your kids you do the best with what God has blessed you with. I have met many children in my path that have had hard hurdles to go through; all of them were because they had a stubborn mom that knew that her child could do better and deserved the best opportunities. Working with them all the time I know you do this and I know it’s hard with 4 but you push hard to get what you KNOW that Carpenter deserves. Don’t settle if you think he can do more.
Sweet comments are so not a band-aid in those times. But he is a VERY cute and smart kid and he can do anything that his body will allow him to do, it just might take some extra effort. I have been to the Myers center and it is wonderful. God’s miracles are there and it’s amazing what they can do with children.
I will be praying for you for your peace.
Stacey, I'm trying to keep up with Carpenter through your blog and when I read this I wanted to come and sit in your living room and talk. You are a fantastic mom and do the best for all your kids...I know you will find the place where Carpenter can grow and blossom. He has a terrific advocate in his Mom. Keep going - you're doin great! I miss all of you guys.
Bless you. Please know that I am praying for your peace and for sweet Carpenter's future. You are a wonderful mom, don't let the Devil tell you otherwise!!
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